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Laura A Manning's avatar

A very powerful piece Mark - I think this may be your best work so far. Thank you for being so honest in your writing - I’m sure there are many people who can relate to the power of flash backs and PTSD and how challenging it can be to keep a lid on the past sometimes. This is a real insight to how strong and resilient you are Mark and I’m proud to call you my friend. Amazing piece.

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Thank you Laura - I’ve been writing consistently for two years now. This one wrote itself - I suspect all of the best work does. I am also proud to call you my friend x

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Francis F's avatar

Harrowing Mark!!! I’m not surprised it all came flooding back… It’s interesting as I had a conversation with my niece this morning who went to see a kinesiology in Australia where she now works as a medical Dr. The kinesiologist found all sorts of trauma in different parts of her body (I won’t go into detail here) but it was so interesting how she helped her to release that trauma from her body. Thanks for sharing Mark.

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Maggie Jon's avatar

Others have seen better, too. Fight that voice. It just keeps us emotionally constipated, and then we get sick.

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

As ever, sage council, Maggie x

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Ilya Ilienko's avatar

Earth shattering! Good solid personal share, always enjoy your content Mark S.

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Thank you Ilya

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Wendy Varley's avatar

So compelling on those flashbacks to past trauma that catch us unawares. (Those you describe sound impossible to unsee.)

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Thanks Wendy - I know others with far worse experiences. For me, it’s the utterly random nature of how they resurface. One moment you’re fine - then - suddenly not.

Always appreciate your support 😎🤗

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Stephen Gates's avatar

Thankyou Mark - uncompromisingly visceral writing: it is clear the impact that these past event have had on you and thankyou deeply for sharing

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Thank you Stephen - your comments mean a lot to me.

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Ian Goodall's avatar

Wow, powerful! Brilliant, instinctive writing. Something else that yesterday can have taught you.

It's captivating, and even though graphic, not sordid. And, it made me *think*; our complex minds and how we manage (or fail to) what the world throws at us.

I am, of course, talking about the writing...as for the content, well, I hope it ultimately takes you on a positive journey. Thank you & Good luck!

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Greatly appreciate your comments Ian.

One way or another, no one gets through life unmarked.

Learning how to process that is what drives some of my writing.

Best

M

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Cherry Coombe's avatar

You, Mark, write with clarity, without embellishment or drama and show us here, bearing witness, how the body - everybody's body - holds and is formed by trauma.

Thank you for this courageous piece.

All respect.

Cherry

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Thank you Cherry - that was me, yesterday.

I was caught completely off guard and writing about it was the only way to push past it. I'd love to grab a virtual coffee sometime - you've definitely led an interesting life so far!

Best of wishes

Mark

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Cherry Coombe's avatar

yes! How do people do virtual coffee? You mean - have a chat on the phone?

Some substackers have been actually meeting - in groups - in big bars and writing about that here - afterwards - pressing every 'why do I always live on the edges of every body else's 'centre' button I have - and I have plenty!

Anyway - yes. It's always good to connect - and substack's a connecty placey

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Michelle Ellis's avatar

This is really well written. Thank you

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

Many thanks Michelle - hope to catch up soon.

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Guy Robin's avatar

Very well written piece. Made me think of all those things I went to as a cop! It never leaves you…. Thanks Mark.

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Mark V Smallwood's avatar

I’m sorry it brought some of that back, Guy. You’re right - it never leaves us. Just turns up uninvited. I suppose growing up in the same environment gave us one thing at least: the ability to compartmentalise when we need to. Stay well friend.

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